technical translation

[woolymonkey]

Work website text:
We very much regret that VLE users have been experiencing difficulties and poor performance recently, and these are continuing today. The ongoing investigation of the problems of non-availability and slowness show a number of factors are involved. We are working to restore a full and reliable service as soon as possible. Thank you for your patience."

Presumed source text:
As usual, it's either down or crap. You wouldn't believe how many bugs there are! We'll try to cobble together something that keeps it going, but don't expect miracles.

Comments

[smtfhw.livejournal.com]

I can put it even more succinctly:

"It's not working. We don't have a clue why."

[woolymonkey.livejournal.com]

The weird thing is that it's behaving as it always does. Whether this qualifies as "working" is a matter of standards, I suppose. But there's no perceptible difference from what it was doing in January, or October.

(It's basically a message board. It runs very slow, crashes more than you'd want.) I'd love to post a thread asking how I'm supposed to know whether it's working or not.