the beast of girton

[woolymonkey]

I couldn't get Humbug to come in tonight so I went down the garden to see if he'd got stuck in a tree or been cornered by one of the farm cats. I found him crouched over a freshly killed pheasant.

He let me bring it, and him, in and was apparently happy to trade it for a pouch of Whiskas. Sunday lunch at the monkey house will be pheasant casserole.

Comments

[dharma-slut.livejournal.com]

Wow, you have a gourmet-meal-provider shaped like a fuzzy thing

[woolymonkey.livejournal.com]

Yep. We do :)

[desperance.livejournal.com]

Yay! The Bug feeds his family!

(Mac plans to feed us on scrub jays, American sparrows, and other little irritants not yet identified...)

[tamaranth.livejournal.com]

May I recommend The Roadkill Cookbook? Never mind details of demise, it has some handy cooking tips. Also recipes for CAT.

[woolymonkey.livejournal.com]

We started with roadkill recipe instructions off teh interwebs but decided the English shooting classes know best on these matters: http://www.shootinguk.co.uk/homefeature/524353/How_to_prepare_a_pheasant__with_Amy_Willcock.html
"At the end of your shoot you'll be given a brace of pheasants..." You pluck them on a newspaper. Apparently, it doesn't actually have to be the Telegraph, but I'm sure it helps.

[woolymonkey.livejournal.com]

Bug is very proud. Also very full since he ate the liver, heart and 5 partially formed eggs. He hunts, I prepare it: symbiosis. Pheasant is now stewing with bacon and sausages. He may well get some more.

[desperance.livejournal.com]

Splendid Bug. I've never eaten a partially-formed egg; they must be a delicacy somewhere...

[woolymonkey.livejournal.com]

You know how egg yolks look when you've separated eggs and managed not to break them? There were 8 things like that in amongst the innards, decreasing in size from large marble to very small petit pois. There was also one proper egg that apes cooked and ate. Maybe the shell was thinner than normal but I don't know what's normal for pheasant eggs.

[desperance.livejournal.com]

Me neither. Don't think I've ever cooked or eaten a pheasant's egg. And I'm delighted to learn that they line up in formation, like an assembly-line. That hadn't occurred to me, that a bird would be working on more than one at once; I suppose I just never thought about it. Humbug has taught us all a lesson today...

[ivory-goddess.livejournal.com]

Blimey! I was going to suggest putting a bell on his collar, but if you like pheasant...

[woolymonkey.livejournal.com]

He got a bell this morning. I hope the pheasants are too stupid to take the hint but I don't want him killing any more great tits. He got one last week :(
We told him the bell was a special medal worn by cats who have caught ostriches. He seemed to go for it, but I don't know how well it will last. He's very good at losing collars, even silent ones.

[tamaranth.livejournal.com]

OMG YOUR CAT IS USEFUL.
*stares meaningfully at ozymandias_cat*

Hurrah for Humbug! And pheasant casserole, nom!

[woolymonkey.livejournal.com]

Weird, isn't it? Or do I mean 'isn't he'?

[dbalthasar.livejournal.com]

Wow! None of my cats as ever done anything that helpful! (Ok, yes, Floyd brought me that mouse when I was sick. He meant well, I think.)

[woolymonkey.livejournal.com]

It's the thought that counts.
But dinner is nice too.

[penknife.livejournal.com]

That is a very helpful cat indeed!

[woolymonkey.livejournal.com]

He's certainly helpful. We're not so sure he's a cat...

[penknife.livejournal.com]

Helpful cat-shaped beast! Perhaps he is an ocelot.

[http://users.livejournal.com/la_marquise_de_/]

The marquis is looking at Horus and saying, 'Well? Go on then.'

[woolymonkey.livejournal.com]

Humbug says to tell Horus he's available for coaching. He says lesson 1 is 'being not stripey, spotty or cat-shaped'.

[http://users.livejournal.com/la_marquise_de_/]

Sounds like a job for Mooncat. If she can bring herself to do something so akin to work.

[dorispossum.livejournal.com]

A cat that feeds humans? Sounds like a disturbance in the natural order... (cue portents etc...)

[woolymonkey.livejournal.com]

So true! Already we're experiencing rains of, well... rain!